The Question That Stopped the Room

This month I had the privilege of delivering my keynote, Why Your Message Isn't Landing — And What To Do About It, as a featured presentation for three different associations. Thirty minutes of content, ten minutes of Q&A, and every single time, the questions at the end taught me something.

Because the questions tell you where people are actually stuck.

The question that stopped the room

At one of the keynotes, an audience member pushed back in the most interesting way. She asked: if you know how to identify what someone needs, could you just fake belief in your product to close the sale?

My answer was no. And I meant it.

People feel inauthenticity. That's not a soft, feel-good idea — it's one of the real reasons salespeople and leaders lose credibility. When we push a solution before we understand the person in front of us, we're not communicating. We're performing. And the other person knows the difference.

The framework I teach — LAND — starts with the Listener for a reason. Before you say a single thing about what you offer, you need to know who you're talking to, what they already believe, what they're worried about, and what they actually need. Only then do you earn the right to present a solution. And if your product isn't the right fit? Say so. Make the referral. That's not losing a sale — that's building the kind of trust that comes back around.

We never want to sell someone something they don't need. Our job is to find out what they do need — and then either provide it or point them to someone who can.

The question about walking in cold

At another session, someone asked how you build rapport quickly when you're walking into a room full of strangers. It's a deceptively practical question, and it connects directly to why messages don't land.

The short answer: don't walk in cold if you can help it.

I learned this years ago from my mentor at Toastmasters. Arrive early. Circulate. Talk to people before you're "on." Ask about their week, find some common ground, make a real connection — even a small one. Because once there's a connection, people hear you differently. Instead of evaluating you, they're rooting for you.

In a room of 50 people, if you've genuinely connected with 15 before you start, that energy ripples. You don't need to win over the whole room from scratch — you already have allies. And if you're online, the same principle applies: greet people as they join, notice something, ask a question. It only takes a moment, and it changes everything about how your message lands.

Want to go deeper?

If this resonated, I have leadership coaching and workshops ready for exactly that — a 90-minute session, a half-day, and a full-day version that gets into the real depth this work deserves. And yes, a book is in the works too.

If your team is struggling with low engagement, unclear communication, or messages that just aren't getting through, reach out and let's talk.

Because communication isn't complete when you speak, it's complete when people understand, remember, and know what to do next.

Until next week!

Penny

PS: For more newsletters, check out my blog. We also offer two complementary visits to our weekly Think Bigger Friday online mastermind for small business owners ready to grow and who want to be around like-minded people.